herlucidlife

Not in a good headspace I can feel myself wanting to lash out at anything remotely positive. I find myself wanting to curse anyone saying “keep your head up.” Feeling better than the days before, God’s grace meeting me every time in my sunken place. Needing to hear His voice the most, I have this theory that maybe God uses others to speak through because the one that needs to hear the Word would’ve never opened the Bible to receive His voice. No need for a third party when the connection is closer than His face in my mind, never been seen His character is more beautiful than rare gold. 

Creating to heal the things I stress about the most, nothing is guaranteed but the love God gives to me. Walking around covered, most don’t get to view the real girl underneath the girl they see outside the walls of my home. Only my eyes and God’s have seen the true and living naje. Not on purpose, unconscious, suited up to the nines only on rare occasions do some see the sixty-five percent of my personality…but let’s be real it’s way less than fifty. While good character is always evident, family and friends don’t know the full scope of my being. Kept under lock and key like a well kept secret, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.

No longer a virgin, sometimes I think I save my full self for my forever mate. Having already been hitched, not feeling safe in that union to truly unwind. Damaged goods. I’ve been living a masked life for years now. Fake is not in my blood, rather what people get is ten percent, some possibly forty depending on the context of the relationship, but none have seen one hundred percent. Not looking for anyone to make me feel comfortable around them, rather it’s comfort in myself that needs to be nurtured that I arrive fully one hundred because I gave myself the permission to do so. 

Haven’t been very loving in my speech. Things off in the head, I hate the bottom line of the almighty dollar is the ruler of this domicile creating hurt for those not like them. Every man for himself, devoid of any compassion. I can see clearly the darkness ruling over this land like a king ushering in his minions. Only God’s love can blot out the evils of this world. Only He can save souls thus changing the trajectory of the pain inflicted on others because something is missing in their lives. 

The gospel message states that Jesus, born a man while still fully divine, left His throne in heaven to live thirty-three years on this earth. Sharing the gospel being ridiculed for His devotion to God, healing the broken spiritually and physically, creating disciples for His Father saving souls. Going through every heartache we as humans go through everyday. Then at the appointed time He was tortured and crucified carrying all of our sins to the grave, being separated from His Father. He died and rose on the third day casting away every sin, creating space for every person to come to Christ. Giving us a chance to be joined with our Heavenly Father. Changing the heart so it reflects Him. Placing His Holy Spirit into our beings a personal helper at all times. Love gives everything it has with no look out of a return payment. His salvation can never be tainted, broken, or taken back.

This love exists today if you so choose to believe, sealing your soul for righteousness. He will write your name in the book of life, you will go to heaven. I hate to say that if you choose to not believe you will go to hell thus forever separated from God. It’s not cute but it’s real and this life is literally your only chance to take His hand because once death passes over the body it’s too late. Change this world and your soul forever by believing in God and then walking the way He would have you, by faith. Faith in God grants His righteousness over our lives. Remember faith is the most important for it is the glue holding us to God. Faith is belief in God and trust that He is God. Thus being reflected in your life because God dotingly loves those that have accepted His salvation activated by the faith we have in Him. We are now His children. 

Faith changes the heart shifting it in His direction thus creating a heavenly love that is oftentimes not visible in people’s hearts today. Walking by the Spirit, means following the Spirit lead by God’s voice. Until God comes to take us to our final destinations, let’s be as loving as possible because really God is all we have. 

God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit are love.