herlucidlife

He remembers. Psalms chapter eight, three through four states that God created the moon and the stars. Everything in the galaxies in the heavens above and below, yet who is man that He would remember and look after the son of man. God remembered us, me from the beginning of time. Before creation, through our fall into sin, and after the chaos sin created God remembers me. He remembers us, humans walking on this earth, some acknowledge Him, and others do not. Regardless, God always reminds me that He’s working it out in His timing. I heard those words, listening to a NA meeting on Zoom. 

Words too profound coming from the hearts of addicts, walking miracles of God’s hand still healing, still working. Messages spill from those with days, months and years clean, not just being clean but changing on the inside into someone unrecognizable for the better. Listening intently tucked on my sofa, watching my little Mimi meander around the apartment. I’m in the right place because I meet people that have what I need…a mind and soul that’s healing, moving into better. Not perfect but better. The last speaker for the night said, “God works out things in His own timing.” 

Tears immediately ran down my face. I hold things in until I can’t anymore. I don’t like talking about things because they sound so frivolous when the words come out of my mouth. Letting the emotion run over me, tears coming down. So grateful to be exactly where I need to be no matter how difficult it is to live in this body, this mind. I’ve begun the second week of supervisor training for customer service at Whole Foods. Saying hello to my old team members, feeling the difference in the air. It’s wild how one shift can make everything feel so unfamiliar. After my first day I hugged my cat so tight when I came in the door because it felt good to feel something familiar. 

Learning new information, wondering if I can do this. My mind got scared and considered an exit strategy. Have you ever been in the right place even when it felt like the wrong one?