herlucidlife

I tend to take unintentional breaks from writing. When scheduled posts become long and I have some weeks to live, learn and build in myself. I look up and a month has passed, not my intent. Time to be and live with no concern of sharing online is peaceful. When my mind becomes quiet, and thoughts are concise I can share in the way God wants me too. Being the passion of my life, a love language between God and me. I can never stay away too long. Time has allowed me to look and react to things differently. 

I was having a conversation with a dear friend, and it reflected what I’ve been seeing on social media. There are many people that have left the church due to not feeling welcomed, being judged, or being talked about in a negative way. I’ve always taken the words of the hurt to heart and do my best to welcome new people to the group. I’ve recently encountered something in my own church, and I realized that not everyone that cries wolf is true. New to the fold, just learning about Christ this person came across my church through a mentor. Getting to know people, being welcomed with open arms. Folks going out of their way to be genuine and loving to a new creature born in Christ. Watching their baptism on the big screen, it was amazing seeing them learn more about Christ. 

Something changed in their heart…they whispered they never felt welcomed. Folks sat with them when their child was in the hospital. We went to lunch in order to know their side of life, being together outside of the church walls. Texting, sending encouraging words, always listening and praying when the emotions got too heavy. Helping them move homes. Yet with all that, with all the laughter and open arms they did not feel involved. What more could have been done? What else was this person looking for that would have helped them feel loved? They were validated in their joy and pain when we prayed over them. 

Expectations can be a doozy. Expectations of what “support and love” should look like can allow someone to think they are not receiving it. I’ll say this gently…not everyone that walks into church is looking to love the church. I’m not talking about “church,” I’m talking about the Church as in God’s people. Some don’t realize how their expectations can cause them to look for things out of people that should be going directly to God first. It hurts my heart to think that this person is going to say they weren’t welcomed in church when really, they were welcomed, but their expectations caused them to leave. The encounter made me think of all the people who are spreading they weren’t welcomed when they really were. While overshadowing that some truly have been hurt and neglected, from the outside how do you know who’s truthful? Really, we don’t know, every single person must receive God’s love at all times even on our off days. 

Expectation can cause riffs in God’s people and even cause new people to walk out of something that is loving. There are church people who are judgmental, there are also folks outside of the church who are judgmental too, and it’s that mindset that qualifies us for the blood of Jesus. Jesus shows His love through people. I’m reminded that Satan will try to use the brokenness in people to keep them away from God. What better way to hurt God than to destroy His Church? The hearts of those outside the church are broken and the ones in the church are barely healed while learning how to be more like Jesus, there’s bound to be some tension. No person is better than the other nor do either side do life correctly all the time yet if expectation we’re thrown out then maybe all people could grow in Christ.