herlucidlife

I hope you’re okay. I pray the wages of life didn’t break you. I pray life on life’s terms didn’t bruise your back too much. Things came out of nowhere; no notice events changed your life unexpectedly. Never ready, had no one to help you out of your situation. Prays being sent to God on your behalf, He is the only one that knows what life is. Something happened and it showed you who was really in your corner. Your view of friends has changed and you’re not sure who to keep in your life. Anger boils up toward God because you don’t understand how He could let such a thing happen. How could God let your life almost crumble? Sitting in the consequence of your actions, God was there even when you couldn’t see Him. How could this situation be a part of God’s will?

Anger stiffens towards people you thought should’ve helped you out, but they didn’t, they couldn’t. Phone calls and texts went unanswered. Taking a step back to process, to let the dust clear. The person you’re most angry at is yourself. Angry you didn’t know what was coming because you feel you should’ve been more prepared. Angry at your past self for digging a hole that would trip your future self. Losing things, you worked hard for. God has a way of disrupting life to remind us of Who is really in control. He has a way of using disruption for the greatest breakthrough. His biggest blessing can come out of a downfall. He walks with us through our consequences but does not take them away. Yet you aren’t satisfied with that, you didn’t want the heartache to happen at all, naturally. 

I don’t assume to know how you feel, yet I empathize with how I felt when I went through life events that changed how I viewed everything. Learning to live life without something you had put your heart and soul into. Taken, gone. How do you get back what was lost? How do you learn to start over? Forced into a time warp where your worst nightmare came true, how do you cling to God? Do you feel loved even when life does things you don’t love? Do you love God when He does not take away the consequences? Do you blame others for the upheaval in your life? Or expect them to create a way out for you? Do you love God even when He takes away what you worked for?

I’m speaking to the person that thought life was going exactly how it should and wasn’t looking for God to step in and change things. I’m talking to the person who had figured out life just for it to change again. It hurts yet God uses the unexpected pain to draw us closer, if you allow it too.