herlucidlife

I, Yahweh has spoken, was repeated all throughout Ezekiel. What God speaks is what will be. That truth can feel gut wrenching especially when something I really wanted was removed. It can also be freeing because what God says is what will be. I can rest in His voice. I really struggle with God’s direction in romantic relationships. It’s so much easier to surrender my will when it comes to every area of my life. I’ve gotten a lot better at asking God to direct the path, remove people and situations that do not bring me closer to Him. While also praying that if something will bring me closer to Him then let it live freely in my life. 

Romantic relationships are much more difficult for me. In the past I was so desperate to be loved, to be wanted, to say I was in a relationship. I would tie myself to men that God absolutely told me not to be with. I caused myself a lot of hurt because I did not want to allow God’s voice to reign true in that area of my life. I hurt others in the process because I was not well enough to be in any relationship. The relationship with myself was broken. By holding onto control I was losing trust in God because I was standing in the way of His direction and design for my life. Thankfully, on the other side of those decisions I see so clearly how I have to wait for God to speak. Granted this lesson is not in the context of what Ezekiel was going through. Yet I believe God’s voice is life changing no matter what the context is. 

The scary part of waiting for God’s voice is possibly not receiving what I thought I needed or wanted with the specific person I want it with. The greatness of God is that He changes my heart to desire exactly what He has spoken into my life. I have a very difficult time letting go of ideas. When my mind is stuck on a person it’s hell removing that person from my mind. In some cases it has absolutely made it excruciating to heal from that person because most of the battle was letting go. God has been blocking certain people from me, He’s been protecting me, allowing the angels to watch over me and fight on my behalf. I fight on my knees in prayer because I know God hears every single word whether it be a thought or spoken out loud. 

When God speaks the clouds move. When He breathes the animals listen and obey. The universe was created through His words. I believe that everything He speaks never comes void, never runs on empty. There is nothing He speaks that will fail. He watches up high and sees things down low. He hears all, sees all, knows all, controls all. Never surprised by the ways of this world, I have a refugee in my strong tower. He loves His children. He may command us to do hard things but with every step of the way He never leaves. He spoon feeds every task, preparing and building us up. But when God speaks, the battle has already been won, the outcome has already been set. He is so gracious to walk us through this life. 

I choose God because He first chose me. God knows who is going to choose Him and who won’t but He still gives us the choice to choose for ourselves. Sin leads to death, the Blood of Jesus leads to life and that is predestined through His word. God spoke it, that’s it. Now how those things unfold are up to the choices we make daily. But I want God to speak for me, through me, over me and around me. God spoke and I’ve chosen.