herlucidlife

love story

  • I am whole

    Walking to my car, sliding into the front seat, closing the door behind me. Reaching to…

  • soon forgotten

    Writing your name in the google doc. Writing the first sentence of my amends to you.…

  • lost

    I rarely listen to love songs. I protect my ears the best I can with Christian…

  • linear

    Smiling in my face, saying all the right things. Though I need to make amends for…

  • moving slow

    Crust still in the eyes, mind blurry reaching for my phone to pull up another website…

  • fire burns

    Meeting new people at work. A young man caught my eye. Hired at the same time,…

  • missed conversation

    Every time we see each other our eyes meet, we grin and ask how the other…

  • faith unseen

    I’ve been daydreaming recently, though it is my coping mechanism for being single. It keeps the…

  • ghost to hope

    A vision of you came across my mind today. I couldn’t see your face yet I…

  • in the air

    He’s on the way. I feel something shifting in my gut, a knowing of something unseen.…

  • cut ties

    I googled an ex-boyfriend tonight. A man I thought was the person for me. This year…

  • 1956

    Sitting in the Whataburger drive-thru line at one thirty in the morning. Waiting for the line…

  • waves

    I’ve always wanted a godly man but my compass has been filtered through lust and physical…

  • unwanted

    Unwell. Reeling, mind running, jolting back and forth between subjects. Not feeling super great, my insides…

  • removed

    Sitting under the desk as the tornado sirens roared through the evening sky. The atmosphere is…

  • redirection

    Seriously, I don’t understand this man at all. Didn’t reply to my SnapChat but has the…

  • no fruition

    I’m a hopeless romantic looking for the good in every man, in every situation. Yet sometimes…

  • no meaning

    I’m writing these words because I simply need to remove emotions and thoughts from my mind.…

  • love language

    I often think the man God has for me won’t want me if I have too…

  • waiting

    The emotions were high at the beginning of the day. Slowly the decline began. Feelings and…

  • elegant

    Doing my best to create space away from you. Muting your story in SnapChat, doing my…

  • more than

    Walking around the apartment in a new pajama set my friend gave me. I felt sexy,…

  • designed

    The story doesn’t end because of a redirection. I’m learning that redirections from God are protective…

  • square zero

    Emotional. Feelings overwhelm me when love is in the mix. It is something that consumes my…

  • the other shoe

    We were doing well. Enjoying the conversation, enjoying the energy created between us. I didn’t realize…

  • door

    I asked God to open the door. I asked God to open the door to you…

  • apple

    I love talking to my friends about new love interests. They give me the courage to…

  • can’t let go

    Listening to Jhenè Aiko to pull the sentiments out of my mind. I wouldn’t say my…

  • supposed to be

    I need a weight lifted off of my shoulders. Thing is I put the boulder there.…

  • listen

    Obsession. I get stuck in the fantasy. All I need is a subject. I tend to…

  • day one

    You watched my SnapChat Story. You were the first person to look. Watching from afar. Possibly…

  • reach out

    I thought of you today and I hope I was thought of too. I tend to…

  • against God

    The greatest challenge is waiting when I think a new love is on the horizon. Having…

  • love?

    What is love? I’m guilty of going off emotions before it becomes an action. Overthinking has…

  • enjoy the ride

    Off and on I thought about you today. Excited for another innocent exchange at work. Nothing…

  • simple exchange

    Working a six hour shift it was time for a thirty minute lunch. Having a split…

  • gone

    I keep looking for reasons to reach out and then I go back into my bubble…

  • look away

    Love. It takes months for me to tell a guy I think he is cute. I…

  • no longer fester

    Begging God to remove you from my mind. Tired, fed up with obsessive thoughts. Opening the…

  • can i say hi?

    I playfully asked God if I could contact you. Immediately I felt a little tug at…

  • delayed judgement

    I don’t know where you are or who you are with. I don’t know how your…

  • still here

    I can’t stop looking at you. I do my best to not sneak a peek from…

  • two years

    It’s becoming increasingly harder to write about you. Increasingly more difficult to utter a thought. In…

  • flabbergasted

    Hurt. Revelations being seen and known. I don’t want to be honest because I’m scared of…

  • dead life raft

    I felt a heaviness all day. Picking my body apart, hidden underneath it all was you.…

  • haunted by you

    Staying is scarier than leaving. Leaving is harder than staying. And loving is excruciating knowing you’ll…

  • in my bosom

    I was doing so good letting you go. I feel myself allowing you to creep in…

  • sideline views

    Sitting across the room, passively looking at you in the debrief meeting. The last debrief meeting…

  • healing separately

    Some things die hard, not from a lack of trying. I’ve dedicated time to letting you…

  • heartache is purposeful

    I can’t wait to go to sleep, hopefully you’ll be there. I’m beginning to feel bad…